Well, baby nurse #1 didn’t last too long. All she did was complain about how difficult a baby Dana was. The nurse was not very gentle with Dana either. She was also either on her cell phone all night or listening to music on her cell phone. I think part of the reason Dana did not sleep was listening to all that awful music, plus the nurse had the lights on all the time so that she could read. Maybe if she slept when the baby did, she would have had more patience for Dana. I gave the nurse a night off when my mom and dad stayed over one night. My mom helped me, and Dana did much better. I decided that baby nurse #1 was going to be fired the minute she walked back into my apartment. I did not need someone around who was not going to be helpful and one that complained all the time. Plus, she had attitude to boot.
During my second week home, I was able to make it to my daughter’s book reading class. I don’t know how I managed to make it to school for 8 am, but I did. I also went on two class trips with Bradley that week. It took all my energy to make it to these events. I did not want to disappoint the kids. To them, it seems like all I do is feed Dana and hold her. I guess they are not all that wrong. I have been explaining to them that she is so little and requires more help and attention than they do. Unfortunately, Marlee and Bradley don’t really care about that and just want their mommy around. So, now come all the feelings of guilt. I feel guilty for not taking or picking up the kids from school every day or for missing their after-school activities. I have been trying my best and running around like crazy. I am enjoying my time with Dana and bonding with her. I am trying my best to have it all and be there for everyone. Poor Rob gets home from a long day of work and then he has to be “on” for the kids and then to help me. I know that this is a finite amount of time that things will be this crazy. I am just doing my best to be there for everyone.
Dana is doing well. We went to the pediatrician for a checkup. She gained back most of her weight. She was at 7 pounds, 14 ounces, and her birth weight was 8 pounds, 1 oz. At least I know that I am feeding her enough. I was worrying that she was not getting enough milk from me. I am strictly breastfeeding her and once in a while I express milk and she gets a bottle. She also got a Hepatitis B shot. My poor baby did not like that.
My other baby Josie is not happy at all with the arrival of Dana. I may not have spoken much about Josie, but she was here before all the children and even before Rob. Josie is my 13-year-old cat that I adopted from an animal shelter. She is sweet and completely attached to me. She did not take well to Rob, Marlee and Bradley and is not taking to Dana either. So aside from being awakened by Dana, I have my cat walking on me and kneading my hair all night. She wants my attention too. She wakes me every morning at 4 am to be fed. I have way too many mouths to feed here. If Dana cries loudly and for a long time, Josie starts to walk in circles or pace around me and then every once in a while gives my ankles a bite. I may need to lock her in my office if she doesn’t stop this biting.
I am anxiously awaiting baby nurse #2. Till then, I will muddle through all this and sleep when I can.